It’s been a minute since I last sent out the newsletter. The Thanksgiving long weekend is the busiest time of year for my job, but now that all the Black Friday/Cyber Monday sales are over (dear god, please be over), I can finally turn my attention back to my passion: navel-gazing in this newsletter about “running.”
I’ve been in a treadmill kind of mood lately and you know what I rediscovered? That running on the treadmill is one of the most boring ways to spend your time! Time moves so slowly, slower than when you’re at the dentist. I once tried to do a 17-mile marathon training run on the treadmill but my body revolted at mile 14 and I had to go home. It’s a form of self-induced torture, and yet, many times, like the beautiful fall days of this past weekend, I choose to go to a gym with mediocre ventilation and run on the treadmill instead of going for a run outside.
I’ve thought long and hard about why I do this to myself, and the simple answer is that I save most of the shows and movies on my watch list for treadmill time. The long answer is that, especially when work is nutty or my thoughts are just in overdrive, I’d rather numb my mind with TV than think of creative ways to say “fuck you” to people, which is what I would do if I were running outside.
The controlled environment of the gym, the predictability of the treadmill, and the background noise of a movie musical or British detective show is how I meditate. It’s like my brain walks out of my head, gets an ice cream, then comes back and says “I’m in a better mood, let’s start over!” And then I get off the treadmill and go back to my little life, answering Slacks and wondering if the avocados on my counter are too ripe.
I’ll leave you to think about that and maybe try it for yourself, but do know that reaching this state of TV-treadmill nirvana is not easy. You have to be at least a little motivated to exercise (if I need help with this, I watch this motivational video of Eliud Kipchoge, lol). It is also VERY dependent on the show; you need something that won’t make your mind wander. I tried to watch White Lotus on the treadmill, but I quit before Jennifer Coolidge got to her room. I also tried to get into Game of Thrones a few years ago but the gym lighting didn’t make for a great viewing experience. Definitely got there with Tick, Tick…Boom! and some troubling Netflix thrillers (The Serpent, Behind Her Eyes).
(My editor is apparently too busy to edit today. Sorry.)
Elaheh